Four months ago I decided to jump off the Daily Grind Express and retire after working for 40 years.
Luckily, I never had to take a train to work and for most of the time work didn’t feel like a grind. I suppose I was fortunate in that regard.
I hear so many stories from friends who are counting down the months, or years, until retirement, waiting impatiently to make it to the finish line. I never felt that way. I just knew it was time to do something different in life, whatever that might be.
I was also lucky that I didn’t do the same thing for 40 years. That would have been a drag and would have made it difficult to stay creative and excited in my occupation.
And then retirement comes along. Suddenly, you don’t have to get up and be somewhere at a certain time. There’s no set schedule, no pressing demands, just the so-called good life. Isn’t that what we all look forward to?
There’s time for a big breakfast in the morning, a long bike ride later and, of course, an afternoon nap. In the evening, I can watch a movie or even an entire New York Yankees game that doesn’t get over until 10 p.m. or later. What do I care? I don’t have to get up.
Some days I barely get up in time to bid my wife adieu as she heads to work. My only responsibilities for the day are to walk my dog, Max, and to figure out what to cook for dinner. I’ve actually become pretty good at both.
And certainly, more free time allows for travel to places in the Berkshires and Adirondacks that I’ve wanted to see but just never seemed to have the time to go. This summer I even visited relatives on Cape Cod for a few days mid-week—yes, mid-week—because I could.
It’s all a refreshing change at first, but trying to figure out the rest of your life can be daunting.
In that regard, I’ve taken time to ask those who have been retired for some time what their secret has been in finding their way through the rest of life. What I’ve found out is that there’s no set answer or path and the journey takes time. Many are still trying to figure it out, and some have gone back to work, even if on a part-time basis.
I remember when my mom retired at age 60. She passed away last year at age 90, but she was always on the go. Her passion was volunteering at the Daily Bread Food Pantry in Danbury. She loved helping people in need and in return she was surrounded by other volunteers who became her social circle. She was the oldest volunteer by far and her colleagues loved her spunk and energy. She inspired them.
“No grass growing under my feet,” she was inclined to say.
And in a sense, that is the secret to retirement, to find a way to feel important, or wanted or useful, whatever you want to term it. And that does take time. What didn’t take any time at all to develop was my hidden annoyance when someone says to me, “Hey, I heard you’re retired. What do you do all day?”
What am I supposed to say? I am thinking of coming up with some wise-guy responses. “Well, since you asked, last week I hung out with Brad Pitt on the set of his new movie and later in the week I’m jetting to Bermuda for a surprise birthday party for Liam Neeson.”
No one would believe me, of course, as Neeson had a birthday the month before I retired. The reality is that each day is different for me, even if it’s just doing the simple things in life. The hardest part, at times, is learning to relax and I am getting better at that.
I’m also at the point where my financial advisor says I have enough money saved to eat all the mac-and-cheese I want and not have to worry if there will be money left over to buy a nice bottle of Cabernet. I can honestly say I don’t miss boarding the Daily Grind Express anymore and so far, like my mom, there’s no grass growing under my feet.
Dave Dunleavy was a longtime reporter and columnist for The News-Times in Danbury. He lives in Kent.
